Seriously, i am not sure why,maybe because i have just read daphne's post, or because christmas is drawing near,
which means 9-11jan is getting near too.
idk,
i guess i am someone with constant worries, i guess if you make me stay at home, i will go berserk.
Really.
The wait for the results is just too too nerve wrecking.
i wonder if i will hyperventilate on the resukt day itself.
Hope not.
i don't know, if i am left alone,
i will let my mind go wild,
and these few days, the constant anxious feeling for the results is making me develop butterflies in the stomach.
however, unlike daphne, i have no cofidence of saying that i think everything is ok,
see, that is probably one of the reasons for more fear,
i can't even say that the tests are ok.
that is something not ok.
i start to fear that what is they are especially strict this year,
and all my english tenses are corrected to the core,
i start to worry if i have made alot of careless mistakes for maths
i start to worry that my inferences maybe wrong for ss and history,
i start to worry that i might be overconfident for POA, the subject i have the highest faith in.
i start to worry if such simple questions for biology might actually be more deep,
just that we took it too easily.
i start to worry if i gave stupid answers for chemistry, and if i have gave proper terms and stuff.
i have too many things to worry.
and actually, i might actually say that i will be fine to fail 1 or 2,
esp chem and amath.
but in fact, i am not.
i want to pass them,
and want a B3/4
not a high score i guess,
but good enough to console myself.
i saw people posting about them getting best acheievement, best improvement, etc,
and i really really start to worry,
did i really work hard enough?
probably not.
but i know that it is all too late to regret,
and all i can hope is for the results to be good.
bell curve.
i fear that.
what if by right, for biology, we are supposed to get A1 but because everyone in the whole nation is doing far too welll and all my marks are pulled down by 5-10 marks?
will i cry on that day?
will typing this post here and idling my life away actually pull add on to my karma and make me have worser results?
honestly, i can't even recall what i studied,
does it shows that i have not studied enough?
what will i do if my marks are not good enough?
how will i face my parents,teachers,friends?
all this constant worrying is forcing me to stand on the edge.
arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
